


Nagi's do, don't do and to do list

by ginnyvos



Category: Weiß Kreuz
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-27
Updated: 2012-01-27
Packaged: 2017-10-30 05:06:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/328070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ginnyvos/pseuds/ginnyvos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>1. Do not, under any circumstances, walk into a room occupied by only Schuldig and Crawford without knocking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nagi's do, don't do and to do list

  1. Do not, under any circumstances, walk into a room occupied by only Schuldig and Crawford without knocking.
  2. Knocking _and_ waiting for permission to enter.
  3. Permission from Schuldig does not count because he has a tendency not to care in what kind of state of undress or debauchery people see him.
  4. Three hours of sleep is not enough to function on, no matter how much I might like that.
  5. Interesting articles online are no excuse for not eating.
  6. Do not drink more than two cups of Schuldig’s coffee a day.
  7. Do not suggest to Crawford that he let Schuldig get his own pc, this does not end well.
  8. Do not agree to get out all the bugs after.
  9. Do not get in Schuldig’s dept.
  10. Do not attempt to hack into the computers of the Pentagon. Americans have no sense of humour.
  11. Do not attempt to hack into the computers of the Japanese ministry of defence. Japanese apparently don’t have a sense of humour either.
  12. Despite appearances, remember that Farfarello is the sanest person in the house.
  13. Do not anger him because he _will_ tell Schuldig who took his candybar last Tuesday.
  14. ‘But I was hungry and your room is closer than the kitchen’ is not an acceptable excuse to Schuldig.
  15. Not even if I was busy hacking.
  16. Not even if I was busy hacking for a mission.
  17. Crawford will only keep Schuldig from maiming and killing, any other revenge is fair play.
  18. If Schuldig does find out about the candy, lock self in room and make sure computers are connected to the emergency power.
  19. Schuldig knows where the power-switch is.
  20. Crawford likes to leave out information when briefing.
  21. He does that so things will get more ‘interesting’.
  22. Hack Crawfords computer when I get the feeling he is doing so.
  23. Rice and candy-bars might be enough to survive on, but are not good nutrition (or so Crawford says)
  24. Do not eat anything cooked by Crawford, the man can not cook to safe his life.
  25. Same goes for Schuldig, whatever he cooks has enough fat in it to put German street vendors to shame.
  26. Farfello can cook surprisingly well.
  27. Do not use telepathy to impress cute boys/girls, it tends to scare the sane ones away.
  28. Despite what he might want you to believe, Crawford does NOT know everything.
  29. Neither does Schuldig.
  30. If you find out that Schuldig has been googling ‘aphrodisiac’, take a two week vacation.
  31. Invite Farfello along. He will not come along anyway because he finds drugged up!Crawford way too funny, but will appreciate the gesture.
  32. Make sure room is always locked in absence and computers protected by password.
  33. Schuldig WILL try to crack passwords, and Crawford WILL be grateful for the reprieve.
  34. Do not leave Farfello alone with a computer. He WILL attack it if he loses biddingwars on ebay.
  35. Schuldig does not make a good Farf-sitter during said ebay bidding wars, he will just egg him on.
  36. Make Schuldig buy new screen.
  37. Find out exactly how he managed to make the old one explode.
  38. Do not eat on the kitchen table any longer. Crawford and Schuldig did have sex on there, no matter what Crawford says.
  39. Check for white spots before sitting down on the couch in Crawford’s office.
  40. Make sure not to stay last after mission briefing, it will get Schuldig annoyed.
  41. He might not have any powers, but Bombay is extremely smart. He will try in any way possible to block your powers or use them against you.
  42. It also does not do to underestimate his computer-skill.
  43. No matter how fun it is to hack his computers.
  44. Omi has a very… Interesting concept of what is hot.
  45. He is also gay, as indicated by porn found on his computer.
  46. This is not a free pass to fantasise about him. Schuldig will find out and he will laugh his ass off.
  47. Yohji Kudou is also not good fantasy material, but Schuldig will shut up about that when reminded he was staring at the guy’s ass last mission.
  48. Beds are for sleep.
  49. Find new punishment for Farfarello, he likes hanging off the ceiling way too much.
  50. Do not allow ANYONE to find this list. Ever.




End file.
